She Is A New Chapter
The stories I write will be based on my own experiences. This is the first of hopefully many.
I am going to start by telling you the basics. I am 11-years-old and have an older brother (who’s name I will not say), and our parents are divorced.
My dad has a girlfriend but my mum does not have a boyfriend. I have found it very hard to get my head around the fact they have split. It has been hard but my brother and I are coping.
This is about my dad.
I love my dad very much and could never survive without him, but seeing him with his girlfriend makes me want to cry. My dad's girlfriend is also divorced with two kids. She and her kids are lovely.
I think I don’t like her because she is like a new chapter in my very own life book and I’m not used to reading it yet. I liked the other chapter.
I can never get fully used to change. I remember in primary school (I am now in high school) when our old desks were replaced with new ones and for the rest of my school life I drew on the new ones to make them like the old ones.
Sometimes when I stay at my dad's house we go for a a drive round to his girlfriend's house for dinner and I always feel guilt ridden as all I can think of is my mum, and that this woman and her kids are not related to me, or "I should not be here".
I feel insecure when I am around her and always end conversations with her quickly by asking to go to the toilet or going to look at homework (it is always fake homework that I only bring to get out of conversations).
I spent New Year's Eve with her and her kids and all I could think about was my mum at home alone waiting for midnight to creep in. This memory haunts me.
I started the year with her, but I don’t want to end the year with her.
All I wish for is some advice in the comments below. Thank you.
IMAGE: Nathan Csonka Photography